Chapter 33

I walk into his office and sit in the chair, fuming mad because I remember the conversation vividly on the plane."So Jon who is going to be at this party and did we get your parents a present?"

He pulled me to him at that moment and kissed me deeply. "I love that you just asked if we got them a present. You are finally referring to us as we are, a couple, a we." He smiled and kissed me again.

"Well the ring helps remind me." I admitted.  Even if it was just a promise ring, the idea that he was moving in that direction put me at ease more.

He pulled her just a little closer and ran his hand down her back to her ass and squeezed. "If it doesn't I know of a way to remind you. My hand connecting with your tight little sexy ass."

I even remember how he acted once the fight attendant walked away from them. Serena smiled and looked around to confirm they really were on a private plane, she asked him. "If you had only one thing outside of normal everyday sex with your woman that you could do with me what would it be?"

"Spanking you.  I reserve the right to use not just my hand but some other naughty instruments but yeah spanking you would have to be my choice."

She looked around again to make sure that the fight attendant had not come back.  "Why? What is it about spanking me that you love so much?"

"Its more about your reaction but its also because I like reminding you that you are not in charge I am.  Its hard for you to remember that you don't have to know everything and be everything.  You have said so many times that you would like to know that the world is not on your shoulders.  Well this is one way to remind you that you are smaller, weaker and one hundred percent the woman in this situation so you don't have to be control the world."

"So you spanking me is for my own good?"

"OH absolutely babe.  The other reason of course is that your ass is so sexy and I love making it pink and making your nipples stand up erect."

"Jon." I smirked at him.

"I'll show you later how cute you are when you get horny.  After everyone goes home tonight I'll spank your hot little ass until you moan and beg me to take you to paradise."

"I'll hold you to that." She smiled lacing her fingers into his. "So are you going to answer my questions?"

"Oh yeah we got mom and dad a 10 day cruise to Alaska.  They have always wanted to see it but never took the time. As for who will be there, no worries honey just family.  My kids, their significant others a few work associates that have become family to me."

Once we arrive in New Jersey, Serena feels her nerves kick in.  "Knock it off woman, you are my baby and my family is going to love you as much as I do.  My kids will see my smile and immediately like the woman that put it back on my face so stop freaking out here. I love you that is all that matters in the overall scheme of things."

Serena shakes her head softly. "It is not really that babe. I just had a flash of pain again and I realized one more thing that I can no longer do.  I can not have you meet my mom or ask my dad for my hand in marriage. You won't have anyone who can't like you since all my family is dead."  I tell him and wipe a tear away.  He does not let me keep crying alone.  He pulled me onto his lap and helped dry my tears asking me if there was anyone that he should ask or anyone left in my family that he should meet since he's marrying my family too.

"Honestly honey, I have cousins left, that's it."

"Well cousins are family too or are you saying that you are not close to them?"

"There is only one family member per se that I'd feel like I really wanted her to meet you before we got married.  A lot of the rest of them are family but I don't see them on a regular basis so I'm okay with you meeting them after we get married."

"Well then it is time that I meet this cousin.  Is that Kathy?"

"Yes how did you know?"

"That's who you are talking to a lot when I come over. She is in Michigan right?"

"Yes in Upper Michigan so if we went like in the next two weeks there might still be summertime weather.  It snows there very early in the year."

"OK I say that after my parents shindig here maybe next weekend we head to see your cousin if she's going to be around."

"Jon that is a lot of driving from Chicago it’s like eight hours and I'm already taking time off this week."

"Do they not have an airport?"

"Well not directly where she lives but close."

"Well then we get a flight as close as possible and drive from there, neither of us are broke and it is worth it."

"I agree I think."

He wrapped me tighter in his arms and smiled. "Baby you do not need to know how to wrap your mind around the new reality that you are forced to live in right now.  You have lived through what most people would have curled up in a ball over and lost their minds. I can not tell you how proud I am to call you mine, you've survived what would have killed me."

"I thought it did for a long while.  The whole time you were gone when Jesse hurt himself I thought I would die every night from the pure agony in my heart."

"How did you survive it honey? I know we haven't talked about it much but since we flew into JFK we have time before we get to my place in Jersey. Talk to me."

"I can't say that I survived it like most would. I didn't do it very well Jon. I drank. A Lot." She took a deep breath. "Every night after work I would drink probably an entire bottle of wine.  And then I cried." Again another deep breath, not so much for it being needed but more to get the bravery up to admit the next thing. "Every night. I would say for almost a month that was the pattern. I didn't drink to get drunk though, actually for me it served a purpose. I drank to not feel.  There was too much pain in my soul, I had lost 2 aunts, an uncle, a cousin, my best friend my puppy dog and then finally my mom it was too much for one soul to handled and I broke."

"But broken to you means you are so damn strong to me."

She stopped talking and just started kissing him, hard.  She needed to feel alive, she needed to feel his heartbeat and know she wasn't alone.

Jon let her control it, he knew that she was trying to hard to work through her grief.  They have talked a few times about all the pain and loss she had suffered.  He knew what they had would not have come to be if he hadn't had to leave for six months to deal with Jesse and his surgery.  That time she spent in therapy, fighting to heal.  She fought the demons that threatened to swallow her whole and she won. He never saw that bad parts, he never saw her lifeless and refusing to feel.  By the time he came back to Chicago she was strongly on the road to who she is now.  He could see it even if she couldn't, now sitting in this car with her on their way to his parents.  He knew she would always hurt, she would always miss her family but what got him is that while she had almost completely died emotionally she actually loves more completely and more actively than anyone else he has ever known. Including his ex wife.  Serena loves him completely. Maybe that's because she knows how valuable every day is, maybe that is because she knows that without being invested emotionally you're dead inside. She's felt that already and doesn't want to go back.  He can see that in everything she does, it is cute how she holds on so tight to him so she does not lose another person but then demands she has her own time so she does not lose herself.  He ran his hand through her straight hair. He smiled knowing she straightened it because she was insecure about her 'wild' hair but what she does not realize that he loves her wildness. He kissed her temple and smiled again, "I love you baby."

She turned and smiled to him again.  "I love you too baby, anything I should know about your parents?"

"Nope, my parents are real and they just want me happy.  Just like I want my kids to be happy and if that means they love someone I don't quite understand or know that well, then that is okay because if they are happy in life that's all I can ask for."

"So do they have anything they hate?"

"Yes mom isn't a fan of snakes and swearing with bad bad words she'll get mad at.  Don't say Fuck around her or my dad they might put you in the corner and they are Marines they can do it." He smiled.

I laugh at that and slap his ass as we get out of the limo.

"Did you just slap my son?" Carole, Jon's mom asked.

"Well yeah but he deserved it.  He's such a sassy man."

Carole smiled and shrugged, "Well that's true. She's got you there Honey."

"Mom you are supposed to protect me." He groaned and then hugged his mom. "I love you beautiful." He kissed the side of her face and then smiled. "Mom this is Serena, hon, this is mom - Carole."

"It is so nice to meet you."

Of course there's hugs and smiles from her as we walk into the house and the driver leaves our bags at the door taking the tip from Jon before he smiles. "I'll just bring these upstairs I'll be right back."

As he gets five steps up his mom smiles. "Separate room Jon."

"You are dreaming mom." Jon smiled and finished up to his master bedroom.

I look at his mom, "Oh I can sleep in a separate room that's not a problem Carole."

"Are you crazy? I'm not foolish enough to believe the two of you don't share a bed in Chicago.  I just like to joke with him and he likes to remind me that he's old and does not listen to me anymore."

"Want me to help you get him, I can pretend I don't want to sleep with him with his parents in the house."

Carole smiled and then saw Jon coming down the stairs. "I think we're busted." She laughed as Jon wrapped his arms around me, "Brat, you deserve a spanking for trying to tease me like that.  So not nice to gang up on me with the likes of her." He gestured to his mom with a shrug.  "Besides as my soon to be fiancee you have a job to do, its to love me and hug me when I need it. I need you in my arms at night to give me strength, after all both of my kids are here with their current counterparts.”